Hiatus: End! (Somewhat)
Aug. 17th, 2025 07:27 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bedesSo. I feel the need to address my absence.
Initially, my plan was to not post on Dreamwidth until my current pet project was completed. It is a small visual novel, titled "Peony in Bloom", which was planned to release during February for this year's Aro Jam!
As you can tell. It is no longer February. And the game is still not out.
This is a two-person project. I was in charge of the art assets, and my partner was left in charge of the coding. I will be extremely frank: the art assets, and everything else I was in charge of, were 100% completed in time for an end-of-February release. The coding was not. And the coding is still not. It's, of course, hard to not be frustrated, but my partner is disabled, so I can't be too harsh.
I was, at first, stubbornly clinging onto the idea that my next post to Dreamwidth would be the Peony in Bloom devlog. But I've recently given up on that.
A second factor contributing to my absence is that I recently got my first job! I'm a barista at a popular chain coffee place! Which now means I get to feel the full brunt of Capitalism at its finest.
I am so tired now. All the time. It feels like I am in a constant cycle of preparing for work, working, then recovering from work, with no time for anything creative in between. I haven't written or drawn anything in a long time, and I don't even really want to, either. I'm too tired to even have the desire to do anything, and I feel like I never have enough days off to recover, even making liberal use of my sick days.
So, yeah. Trying to do just about anything right now is exhausting. That's why there's "somewhat" in the title. I hope that I'll be able to be more active, but I also may be too tired to update for weeks, or maybe even months, at a time.
In the meantime, I'll be looking through my Tumblr post backlog and seeing if there's anything I could crosspost on here. I'll hopefully see you around!
Initially, my plan was to not post on Dreamwidth until my current pet project was completed. It is a small visual novel, titled "Peony in Bloom", which was planned to release during February for this year's Aro Jam!
As you can tell. It is no longer February. And the game is still not out.
This is a two-person project. I was in charge of the art assets, and my partner was left in charge of the coding. I will be extremely frank: the art assets, and everything else I was in charge of, were 100% completed in time for an end-of-February release. The coding was not. And the coding is still not. It's, of course, hard to not be frustrated, but my partner is disabled, so I can't be too harsh.
I was, at first, stubbornly clinging onto the idea that my next post to Dreamwidth would be the Peony in Bloom devlog. But I've recently given up on that.
A second factor contributing to my absence is that I recently got my first job! I'm a barista at a popular chain coffee place! Which now means I get to feel the full brunt of Capitalism at its finest.
I am so tired now. All the time. It feels like I am in a constant cycle of preparing for work, working, then recovering from work, with no time for anything creative in between. I haven't written or drawn anything in a long time, and I don't even really want to, either. I'm too tired to even have the desire to do anything, and I feel like I never have enough days off to recover, even making liberal use of my sick days.
So, yeah. Trying to do just about anything right now is exhausting. That's why there's "somewhat" in the title. I hope that I'll be able to be more active, but I also may be too tired to update for weeks, or maybe even months, at a time.
In the meantime, I'll be looking through my Tumblr post backlog and seeing if there's anything I could crosspost on here. I'll hopefully see you around!
no subject
Date: 2025-08-17 08:56 pm (UTC)I’m hoping your partner is able to find the spoons to finish the coding for the visual novel soon. I’m assuming it’s about or includes aromantic experiences given it was meant for an aro jam—we always need more aro art!
And yeah, the whole job cycle—finding a job, landing a job, doing the job—is exhausting, I imagine doubly so with a customer-facing position like yours. Still, congrats on the first job!
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Date: 2025-08-18 05:36 pm (UTC)It's about aro experiences, yes! It's semi-autobiographical, actually. Without divulging spoilers, it's based off of my own experiences with aromanticism, because I've never seen someone like me portrayed in fiction before, even though I know lots of people like me exist.
Thank you for the congratulations, as well!
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Date: 2025-08-18 12:04 am (UTC)Sorry to hear about the VN, but keeping my fingers crossed that you guys will have the spoons for it again one day!! 🤞
I also hear you on the job b/c on one hand, you need it to live and buy trinkets, but it is also STRESSFUL DHJKSHJKDS hope you're able to get a nice break soon!! ❤️
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Date: 2025-08-18 05:37 pm (UTC)When the shift gets rough, I gotta remember what I'm doing it all for...
More toys for my toys collection!!
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Date: 2025-08-18 07:00 pm (UTC)Cheering for you, Bedes!! You got this!! ( ⌒o⌒)人(⌒-⌒ )
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Date: 2025-08-18 12:58 am (UTC)Congratulations on the dev project, that's really exciting! Has your partner been able to reach out to anyone who might be able to help them with the workload?
I hear you on the job effort. It sucks trying to keep energy reserves when so much of life is just job job job. No pressure at all to update - one thing that might help is that even though society really wants us to believe a job is a be all end all, it's definitely and quite clearly not, so have fun enjoying your creative side!
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Date: 2025-08-18 05:42 pm (UTC)He wants to do it himself. He's stubborn like I am in that way, lol! He wants to prove to himself that he can do it.
Besides, it was conceived as a project for us to do together ("partner" here is being used to mean both "partner in this project" and "romantic partner", since we're both!), and I'm very much a control freak regarding my ideas (it was a miracle that I let even the person I trust most in the world on board), so getting someone else on is something that neither of us are particularly interested in.
And thank you for the reminder!! It's hard to remember that my job isn't everything, but my creative pursuits are what keep me going!
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Date: 2025-08-18 09:18 am (UTC)if your VN is ever published, id be interested in reading it
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Date: 2025-08-18 05:42 pm (UTC)I'll be cheering for you to find that work-life balance too! And thank you, that means a lot!
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Date: 2025-08-18 06:31 pm (UTC)ooooh really feel that. feeling the full brunt of capitalism in food service/retail/etc. will leave you absolutely wrung out (<-has worked both. unfortunately). i hope the customers go easy on you!
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Date: 2025-08-18 11:47 pm (UTC)Thank you!! <3